Anorexia Recovery & Treatment

Ok, so i am in this partial hospitalization program for anorexia recovery. Right now, i am 5′4, 17 years old and 81lbs (i gained a pound this week! which is good, i guess). Anyways, the doctors there want me to reach around 100-105lbs and they see this as an ideal weight. However, i have always been very thin (i have never weighed over 87lbs– i continued to grow in height, but failed to gain weight). The idea of weighing 100 lbs really kind of scares me, but i want to get out of this program so i can go back to school and have my normal life again. I also know in my heart that i need to gain weight, but 20lbs seems like so much. Is 100-105 still thin for my height and age? The idea of gaining 20lbs scares me, and im afraid i will look and feel totally different. I am just really dreading it, because the doctors expect me to gain 1-3lbs a week, (they give you meal plans and calorie increases, but it seems like some of the girls in the program have to eat a ridiculous amount of food) or i will have to go inpatient. Can anyone help me calm down? I’m feeling really anxious and uneasy about all this.
Thanks

could anyone give me ideas on what to eat for around 1200 calories a day? thanks x

What do you think of my diet and can anybody give me a rough estimation of my calorie intake? (PS I’m in recovery from anorexia and my stats are 157cm tall (5 ft 2″) and 38kg (84lbs) incase you need to know)
Breakfast:
2 pieces wholegrain toast
10gm PB
1 banana
1 glass orange juice
Mid Morning Snack:
1 piece fruit (generally an apple)
15 almonds and 3 dried apricot halves
Lunch:
Shaved chicken roll= deli shave chicken (1 slice), 5-10 gm light cream cheese, lettuce, tomato, cucumber
375ml ‘Feel Good’ iced coffee
Afternoon Snack:
2 ‘premium’ whole meal crackers and 1 small glass of juice or lemon iced tea
OR 1 small ff cappuccino with 1 sugar
Dinner: generally some meat or fish or something equivalent, with some carbs and some veg/salad for example:
small piece fillet steak with 2-4 MINATURE potatoes (i can’t remember the exact name of them) with butter and some salad or steamed veg
Dessert:
80 gm icecream + waffle cone (250 kj in the cone- i known that one)
OR 80 gm icecream with 2 chopped almonds and 1 Tbs choc sauce.
Wow that seems like a lot when i write it out like that!!! As i said I am in recovery so I am MEANT to be gaining weight! LOL
Thanks everyone for your help!

i am in (forced) recovery from anorexia and am hating this so much. i am now 111lbs at 5′8. i know it doesn’t sound too bad but i look disguisting, and it is sickening to think that i weighed 82lbs only 3 months ago. they want me to be 130! i’ve never been over 105. my shoulders/arms used to hang in a square shape, now there is this disguisting curve where fat has accumulated in my shoulder and upper arm. if i gain much more my thighs will touch. my hipbones are disappearing. all my clothes were a baggy size double zero now my whole wardrobe is too small, i now can squeeze into a uk size 6 and am too embarrassed to buy clothes so big. the boyfriend says i am still thin but i know he is only lying to make me feel better, i don’t deserve him, he doesn’t deserve a fat girlfriend. i am trying to eat as little as possible but i am on a meal plan and am forced by my mum to have breakfast and dinner.

I am beginning recovery from anorexia (17 years old, 5′4 an 82lbs) and i need to gain at least 10lbs to stay out of inpatient. I am really scared, but realize that i need to do this for my health.
I currently eat around 1600 calories, but i need to boost that number. Would it be ok if i ate my regular meals/snacks, and supplemented with 2 Carnation Instant Breakfasts (230 calories each) and one Ensure drink (350 calories) a day? I’m scared because i know these drinks are kind of high in sugar, but i find it hard to actually eat more. So is this a good plan? Would it help me gain weight healthily, and does it affect where i gain the weight?
And also, is it good to drink a Carnation Instant breakfast made with skim milk after workouts? (Especially if i would like to gain muscle)
Thanks in advance